A sense of relief...sorta

Whew! I feel better now after meeting with my Dr. (Dr. G). The morning did not start off to swell. With all this stress going on in my head, I didn't really sleep at all last night. So, that means I of course wake up crabby as all he**. My husband wants me to go crawl back in bed and start over but I'm such a nervous wreck that I get all defensive and more crabby. ha. Finally my nerves start to calm down a bit on the way to Dr. G's office because my husband just laid it all on the line and basically told me that he loved me but I needed to relax if I planned on getting any words out in a proper manner. So we go in and wait for a bit, nerves are boiling, and then the door opens. I'm a bit calmed by her cool, relaxed manner....and the fact that she has a little Pomeranian puppy following her around gave me a smile. Yes, she brings the dog to work and the dogs name is Lilly...she is so ugly, she is cute! haha. Anyway, she starts off by asking me how I feel and then I just go with the flow. Here is basically what I said:

1) I didn't feel comfortable not knowing why I had the ectopic pregnancy.

2) I didn't feel comfortable trying again to have a baby b.c I was scare of another ectopic preg and losing my other tube....I only have one left. 

3) I definitely did not want to go down the road of ART....I was not comfortable with it and it was against my faith.

So then I told her that my cousin approached me and introduced the idea of Dr. H to me. I researched him and I was very attracted to the fact that 1) he has a high success rate and 2) all his practices and work are in accordance to my faith. With knowing all of this and having all these feelings, DH and I felt that this was the best path for us to take...one that made us feel comfortable, safe, and in the arms of God.

The best part.....SHE WAS TOTALLY ALL ABOUT IT!!!!!!! Holy Moly Guacamoly! She expressed her care and love for the two of us, her determination to do whatever she can do to help with this process, and her complete understanding for the importance of my faith and feelings. WOW! Praise the Lord and thank you Holy Spirit for the inspiration to get through this morning.

Now, on the sorta note....I have to go get a mammogram on Tuesday. Nothing major to worry about ( I hope) but I did have cyst a couple months back and she wants to check it out and make sure I am 100% before she lets me go through with the whole Dr. H process. So please pray for that ladies. Just pray that it is nothing...

With all this being said, my mom just called and I just broke down in tears uncontrollably. She is on her way over now to hug me but I just couldn't stop crying. I think this has been weighing on me for a while and with this and all the other concerns ahead with Dr. H and school starting back....I think I just had some hidden stresses and they are all coming out now. Ugh. So, I'll be fine. Momma is on her way over to hug me. Thank you for all your sweet love and support.

Telling my doctor tomorrow....

Ok, so tomorrow my husband and I have our consultation meeting with my doctor here in town. Y'all, I am so darn nervoussss! Why? My doctor is very close to both my family and my husbands family. She is a wonderful, loving woman but she has a personality that is a bit different and hard to get used to...which I actually like about her. She is verrry blunt and upfront and she has a very intimidating way about her...but we love her! Does that even make sense? ha. I honestly trust my life in her hands and I am soooo worried about what she is going to say tomorrow morning when we tell her that we are going to see Dr. Hilgers. 

So, questions...

1) How do you think I should start out? Meaning, how do I introduce this whole Dr. Hilger's idea to her and make it sound....I don't want to sound as if I don't know what the heck I'm talking about.

2) I really want to approach it from a Catholic standpoint, but also from a medical standpoint. How??

PLEASE HELP!   HUGS to all of you!

Randomness

Hey! I'm back from Chicago. I had such an awesome time visiting my friends from college. This was my first trip away (besides the beach or the bay) from my sweet DH since we have been married and as cheesy as it sounds, I really missed him! I kept wishing he were there with me experiencing the awesomeness of Chicago...my favorite city in the U.S. Anyway, I came to an awesome realization while I was there and it felt sooo good. I am a big adventurer. I left home (Alabama) for 8 years.....4 yrs college at St. Marys College (lived in Rome my soph year), 2 yrs grad school at Notre Dame, 1 yr working in a cafe/pub in Ireland,  and 4 months in Edinburgh working at the Univ. of Edinburgh. 

After all that, I suddenly had the realization that I wanted to move back home. It was weird because I swore I would never move back. I love love love my family, but they always came to me wherever I lived so I thought I would be ok with that in my future life...I was wrong. I got this "all of a sudden" feeling that I needed to move back home. And guess what...2 months later, I met and married an Alabama boy...who would have thought! God is sooo good and he knew just what I needed. I had to get all that out of my system first, before meeting my sweet DH. Now, I am still an adventurer and drive my husband crazy with trip ideas here and there and everywhere. But now I have him to do these adventures with me. It's funny because I'm totally rubbing off on him! haha. We saved up our whole first year of marriage for a trip to Europe and we succeeded! We spend our 1 yr anniversary traveling through Italy and France for 3 weeks....it was glorious!

Now back to what I was saying earlier....When I was 21-26 yrs old, I was constantly wanting to live here, wishing I lived there, wanting to go here and there. I was constantly on an adventure. BUT, this past weekend when I was in Chicago, I came to the realization that this was one of the first times in my life where I could say that I loved where I was visiting but I wasn't wishing I lived there. Does this make sense? I wasn't wishing or wanting....I am perfectly content and happy with my life in Alabama with my sweet DH and that feeling felt sooo good! After a couple of days with my old college buddies, I couldn't wait to get back to DH. It felt so good to miss him and then be able to come home to him with open arms. As cheesy as it sounds, we were attached at the hip for the next 24 hours! haha.

God is so good:)

So the other day I sent an email out to a group of girl friends (college & highschool) and caught them up on my new adventure with Dr. Hilgers. Surprisingly, I have had some write back telling me that their doctors were trained by Dr. H. I was so surprised. I thought I was going to get emails back questioning me on who this Dr. H fellow was. One of my friends said that she heard that her Dr. in Michigan was leaving to go work with Dr. H in Omaha. It's a small world. 

I got a letter from Linda at Dr. H office telling me that she is basically swamped but would be in touch with me soon about scheduling my visit to Omaha. Until then, I have my phone glued to my side waiting for her to call. 

Blood series: I did a blood draw last Wed and then start back tomorrow with every other day. Oh and I'm bringing the sweet nurses cookies:)

And the blood draws have begun!

So I got the call from Ann, Dr. H's nurse yesterday. She faxed me my info for the lab and she also informed me that Linda would be calling soon to schedule my Omaha visit for Oct. or Nov. I'm, of course, hoping for October!!  I went to the lab and I was a bit nervous about how this was all going to pan out, esp b.c I didn't know much about this blood work stuff. At the hospital lab I met a sweet woman who totally took me under her wing. She sat with me and read through all the papers and was so helpful! I was thinking this was going to be difficult to ask the lab to hold the blood, etc, but it all worked out!! I'm bringing her cookies next time:)

I thought that I was going to have to get blood work every other day starting yesterday. Dr. Hilgers, however, wants me to draw (CD 5), which was yesterday, and then not until CD 13, and then every other day till P+11. So I'm assuming my estrogen is good and they want to see my progesterone results. Either way, this whole scheduling was perfect b.c I have to go out of town tomorrow. Once again, I feel God working with me in so many ways. I'm leaving for Chicago to go visit my best friend from college and I was thinking I was going to have to find a lab up there but now I don't have too!! YAY!!

I'll be gone till Sunday so I look forward to catching up on all you ladies when I return. I pray pretty much the whole time on flights, so I will make sure to include all of you. God bless you all:)

Starting the process!

So today is cycle day 5 and I am also expecting a call from the nurse at PPVI to discuss the process of all this. I'm pretty sure, from what I gathered from Heather on Friday, that I get to start the blood draws today! I think it is so funny to see what I get excited about these days...I know you all feel the same. It's amazing what all this does to your life and how your whole perspective changes. Now I'm jumping at the fact that I get to go start my blood series...woohoo...hahaha. This is why I'm so happy I have you ladies out there in the blog world b.c i'm sure my friends here in town think I'm a bit crazy. Off to help my dad move some things. Once I hear back from PPVI, I will update. Hugs to all you ladies this morning:)

I feel God all around me...

About a week ago, my cousin Leslie, who is my practitioner of Dr. Hilgers, called to tell me not to get too excited about getting my letter because Dr. Hilgers was busy in conferences this month. BUMMER. So I just gave it to God and told God to handle it all for me. Days later I got the letter! (I'll post that info at bottom) So I get the letter and freak out, of course. I pick up the phone immediately to call and set up things with PPVI. Let me back track for a second.....So I knew that once I heard from Dr. Hilgers, my next step would be the blood/hormone testing. I kept thinking to myself how great it would be to be able to start that blood work before going back to teaching in Aug. I just didn't want to have to manage teaching with getting blood work and then having everyone ask me why the heck my arms were bruised. Anyway, I prayed for God's timing and that comforted me a bit. Now back to what I was saying...the day I received my letter I also started my period!!! PERFECT TIMING LORD!!!!!! Why...because when I talked to the PPVI office, they said the nurse would be contacting me Tuesday...that is 5 days away and the 5 day of my cycle!! Meaning that I could start the blood work on Tuesday and get it mostly all done before going back to teach. The Lord is working away!! So I got off the phone with the office and then thought...crap, I need to make sure I can start this blood work Tuesday and not just assume. Soooo I call back, hoping they aren't annoyed with me. Sweet Heather...she was so nice to me and understood my reasoning for wanting to start on Tuesday and she asked if she could call me back. Aghhh...I was so nervous! 5 minutes later she called back and asked if I could get to a computer and fax and fill out my patient forms so that they could have them on file and get me all registered. Of course, I jump right to it and get her those papers within, I swear, like 7 minutes. She said the nurse would then call me Tuesday and already have my papers and that we would be able to start the blood work then. Y'all, I was elated! I almost knocked my husband down in the driveway when he got home. He was sooo excited too. It was so cute to see his sweet face just light up! I thought to myself, "LORD, you are sooo good and I feel you all around me. Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I honestly felt a sense of relief and just awe in knowing that this all happened in such perfect timing. I'm still in awe. I feel good:) I know I have a long way to go but I'm happy to be starting the process finally.

Letter from Dr. H to my practitioner, Leslie, trained under Dr. H....she also is my cousin : I'm cutting it down to the important parts...

Your client is experiencing functionally abnormal cycles, unusual bleeding, and has a history of ectopic pregnancy. In reviewing her chart, it reveals limited mucus cycles and tail-end brown bleeding. These findings are often associated with hormonal disfunction, ovulation defects, endometriosis, and/or chronic low-grade endometrial infection.

I would like to make the following recommendations. She should have a thorough hormone evaluation of her menstrual cycle (without med), a thyroid system dysfunction panel (WHAT IS THIS??), an ultrasound series to determine whether there is an ovulation-related defect, and a diagnostic laparoscopy, hysteroscopy and selective hysterosalpingogram, as well as, endometrial cultures. The selective hysterosalpingogram gives us more information than the standard one that she has had in the past. These tests will determine if there is underlying hormonal dysfunction, an ovulation-related abnormality, endometriosis or pelvic adhesions, obstruction within the fallopian tubes, low-grade endometrial infection and/or a thyroid condition not diagnosed with standard tests. 

Additionally, we would like her to send us the official report of her husband's recent semen analysis. Once we have this information, we can put together a reasonable plan of treatment. 

....then after he finished letter he had a P.S. Currently, my schedule is such that it will be about two to three months before I can do her laparoscopy. (LADIES---HOW LONG DID IT TAKE Y'ALL ?????) However, the PPVI has now added two other obgyns to the staff who have been trained by me to provide the same surgical services. They are Catherine E. Keefe, MD and Kristina Garnett, MD. If she would like to schedule her laparoscopy earlier than that and have either of those doctors provide her care, please have her inform the nurses.

I GOT THE LETTER!

WOOHOO! I have been praying, hoping, wishing, all the above to get the letter soon so we could start this process. My practitioner for Dr. H told me that he was really busy with conferences for the month of July so not to get my hopes up to get my letter this month but she was proven wrong! YAY! So I called and the nurse will be in touch with me Tuesday. It just so happens that I started period today. I'm supposed to start blood work on CD 5.  So CD 5 is Tuesday and so I am hoping that I can start the blood work this cycle instead of waiting till the next cycle. I asked PPVI and they said they would get back to me today and let me know if they could go ahead and fax me blood work orders so I could get started. Lord, are you listening:) 

I know we have a long road ahead but I'm so relieved to finally be able to get going on all this. Lord, I'm in your hands and I feel you all around me:)

HPT=Don't waste your money!!

Well I finally figured out how to change my template...took me a while! ha. I'm a little gardener at heart so I thought this template fit well:) My husband built two 10x10 gardens when we first got married and we have both learned so much from growing all types of things. This spring/summer garden went much better than before. We have tomatoes, squash, zucchini, eggplant, and zinnias (my favorite flower!). By the way ladies, they are great in house flowers. I have saved so much money not having to go to store to by flowers. I have to give my hubby all the credit though bc I have probably watered the garden a total of 10x. ha. He loves it! It's his quiet time. He goes out every morning and every evening and waters his garden...he is so cute:)

Had to take a HPT yesterday. I'm on CD 31 and my boobs are so sore! I had a wine tasting bday gathering for one of my best friends last night and I didn't want to go drinking vino if I was prego. I knew I wasn't, but it's always good to check. Plus, as opposite as it sounds, we don't want to get pregnant right now. I can't risk another ectopic and I need Dr. H to figure out whats wrong with me first. Oh and on the topic of HPT, I put the link to this website on my blog. Check it out. It's soooo cheap and they are so easy to use! Def a money saver:)

Still waiting on letter....get here soon Mr!!

Surgery=Weight Gain???

Well I sure am learning alot from all you IF ladies. Now, when I pray to our sweet Lord, I am including all of you in my prayers too. It's a real comforting thing...it's bringing me peace just to know there are others out there that understand.

Do you happen to know if having a tube removed causes you to gain weight after surgery? I know my hormones were a bit wacked but I feel as if my body has changed and  I have gained about 8-10 extra pounds, yet haven't really changed my lifestyle. I read somethings online but you never know online....just curious to hear if someone has had similar experience?

Still waiting on letter from Dr. H....agggghhhh patience!!!

Introduction

I thought I would give you a little insight into my story rather than jumping right into questioning you on your experiences, etc. My husband and I tried and tried for months on end to have a baby. When that wasn't working, we turned to our Dr., whom we absolutely adore. After months of charting, we did the typical shots, pills, etc, but nothing was working and we were stressing. Her next suggestion was IUI...which I was very unfamiliar with and should have looked more into it before we chose to take this path. Her reasoning was because of our post-coital tests. She said that the sperm were dead every time she checked. So, we decided to get my husband tested and it turned out he had super duper fast little guys...he was A ok! So, she determined from that that I had developed antibodies against his sperm...ouch! 

So we went with the IUI to bypass the so called "antibodies." Which, by the way, I totally regret after reading Dr. Toth's book....fingers crossed that nothing spread to the upper region...Dr. H will let us know of that. Anyway, we got pregnant with IUI. We went through the whole emotional high of being pregnant and then came the ectopic pregnancy. UGH!!!!! That whole experience lasted about a month. We tried and tried to save tube, but after two hospital emergencies, my body gave up and we had to have emergency surgery to remove my tube....so sad. 

We are passed all that now and I am healed and ready to go on my journey with Dr. H. After charting with my practitioner here in town, I have realized I am a limited mucus patient and I also have B charted on every day of my period...yikes. That makes me nervous. So, here we are waiting to hear back from Dr. H about what he thinks is wrong. I will be sure to let you know as soon as I found out! Until then.....pray pray pray and I will do the same for you:)

Oh and WheelbarrowRider and Patiently Waiting, thanks for making me feel welcome:)

 

Checking the mail daily

So my charts were sent off in early June to PPIV and I am anxiously waiting to hear back from Dr. Hilgers. Ladies I have some questions...1) How long did it take you to hear back from him? 2) Did he schedule your surgery right away or did you have to wait till after you did the cycle of blood draws? 3) What is the length of time I should be expecting from when I get my letter to my scheduled time I go out to Omaha?


I'm so happy I have people to talk to about this. For a while I was just swimming in my own thoughts of curiosity. Now I can actually talk about and not have people look at me like I'm crazy!!!